long but wonderful day/night...

so my TA gig was canceled this morning gave me time to pack and be ready to head out so after class i picked up a sweet gift for a sweet persons birthday and headed off to Columbia... the drive gets easier and easier every time i do it... its almost therapeutic... having time to think... its nice... or just enjoying nature even tho an expressway has been slammed in the center of it but its nice... i know i'm in Missouri when i see that sign i love it says... "speed limit 70 mph" then i just gun it haha... but all in all i had a nice night... ate good food... met new people... hung out... felt relaxed... and just chilled... its nice just to kick it when you don't have any plans to do anything... kainda just going wherever and doing whatever... late night kinko runs at 3am are nice as well as wal-mart runs at 4am to prepare for an awesome breakfast (that i'm not making) which makes it more special! but i'm beat... not even sure if i'm going to sleep yet but hey i was just told sleep is for the weak... i remember during my freshman year my roommate and i used to stay up super late and we had that exact saying written on our dry erase board which was on our door that was always open haha... oh those were the days... i'm always excited and always down for new experiences... and new things...

till then...beAdventurous...

long drives...

long drives are nice... its just me and my baby out on the open road... hearing the her as she softly hums past 4k rpm... she's always screaming for more i can feel it... i have to keep holding back just so that the both of us don't get carried away... sometimes i purposely put on the cruise control just so that i'm not tempted to really give it to her... but its a good feeling... its as if we are one... she's looking her best... and i've taken the best care for her... i know this sounds lame to some people but to me it makes sense... its a different kind of love... a love that will truly never die...

driving also gives me a lot of time to think... to sing... and to just wonder... wonder about the future... whats going to happen to me... i also wonder where other people are going... i don't find myself constantly asking if i'm there yet... because i know when i'll get there and i know these days we don't get a lot of alone time... well some of us i've been getting alot of alone time but the time in my car is different... since i'm going 85mph down the interstate where i can't be interrupted by anyone... i'm excited...

but then again a part of me wouldn't mind if the drive was a few hours shorter =p

till then...beContent...

sleepless nights...

ugh what time is it... spent most of my night breathing in the night air... surfing the net for car parts... i need new rotors and brake pads... hungry so made a sandwich... tried to sleep... a couple hours later still not asleep... turned my computer on and off about 3 times... decided to blog... maybe ambient noise will help... turn on a fan... leave the tv on... nothing... sometimes sleep just decides not to come i guess... wished a friend a happy birthday at 5:30am... that should be something nice to wake up to... thought about doing push ups and sit ups to tire me out... but i'm lazy... makes no sense right... watching cnn... hopefully boring news will bore me to sleep... perhaps some infomercials will do the trick... but i always get stuck watching them... oh man an infomercial for the swivel sweeper just came on... i'm stuck... hopefully sleep comes soon...

oh don't forget to feed my fish -----> thanks =p

till then...beSleepy...

Lyrics that stick out in my head...

these days the only place i listen to music is on the road... going to and from home... and anytime i find myself driving for more than 5 min i listen to my Zune and i've always done this but lyrics have stuck in my head for some reason... good or bad i have no idea they just seem to place a bookmark in there with out me knowing... so just thought i'd put some down...

Teddy Geiger - Love Is A Marathon

cause love is a marathon
you can't always get tired so fast of everyone
slow down and pace yourself
'cause when it's good
its a long open road

Lights - Saviour

i'm a bit of a manic when it's not as i plan it
cause i start losing my head and then i get up in a panic
remember when we were kids and always knew when to quit it
are we denying a crisis or are we scared of admitting it?

i don't want to know

i just want to run to you
and break off the chains, and throw them away
i just want to be so much
and shake off the dust that turned me to rust
sooner than later, i need a saviour, i need a saviour

Taylor Swift - Fearless

and i don't know how it gets better than this
you take my had and drag me headfirst, fearless
and i don't know why but with you i dance
in a storm in my best dress, fearless (yes i'd wear a dress =p)

Owl City - The Saltwater Room

Time together is just never quite enough
When you and i are alone, i've never felt so at home
What will it take to make or break this hint of love?
We need time, only time
When we're apart whatever are you thinking of?
If this is what i call home, why does it feel so alone?
So tell me darling, do you wish we'd fall in love?
All the time, all the time

its interesting how lyrics are, we really don't think about them or read them in print to find what their meaning is... so i guess i've been obsessed with looking up lyrics and reading them... you can really relate to the artist and what might have inspired them to write what they wrote... still my favorite song has been the saltwater room by owl city... its always been my favorite but after reading the lyrics its become my most favorite song now...

try looking at some lyrics of your favorite songs... i bet some of them will surprise you!

till then...beCurious... (like me!)

some really RANDOM things about me...

i'm a roman catholic... i don't like it when people walk slow in front of me... i like traveling... i love driving as well as my car... i can spend a whole weekend detailing my car... i have 3 sisters... i'm a Leo... i can fix just about anything given enough time... i'm a problem solver/outside of the box thinker... i enjoy a nice rum and coke... or a long island iced tea... i believe that no excuse is too little for a celebration... i'm a hopeless romantic... play the guitar... somewhat of a computer geek... ok just a geek in general... i'm very friendly... will do anything for love... easy going... would like to be more spontaneous but i'm pretty spontaneous already... although spontaneous i understand the importance of planning... i program a little... i don't like to read books... i like to read magazines and articles online... i love select television comedy shows... i love surprises... but hate bad surprises... i've cried in "a walk to remember" , "Wall-E" , and a bunch of other romantic/date movies (hence hopeless romantic.. ugh)... i like eating mixed nuts... yogurt... and could probably become a vegetarian if i did not love chicken so much... as well as the very occasional steak... i like baked snacks over fried snacks like goldfish over chips... i like veggie dip and broccoli over chips... my dream car is a Honda NSX... i wish i was in a band... i like blogging... i work at michaels as a certified custom framer... whatever that is... full time student... strawberries are the only fruit with the seeds on the outside... and i like giving gifts because nothing makes me more happy than other people being happy...

till then...beRandom...

family's becoming busier...

i've noticed that since my sisters and i are getting older now its getting harder and harder to plan something when we are all together each weekend we all have something or at least one of us has something to do... its not a bad thing its just something i noticed... i'm either going somewhere that weekend... or my sister has some concert or some charity benefit to go too... my other sister has some college obligation such as moving in or its orientation or its visiting colleges but she's chosen one and she'll be there soon... its funny cuz my parents aren't making a big deal of my sister leaving for college well cuz she's the second one to go... lol i'm gonna feel sorry for my youngest sister when she goes off to college but then again my parents might hold on to her the longest since she's the last one to live with them... other than me when they did not want to let me go when i first moved out but they knew i had to... its weird seeing my sisters going to college i wonder if they may make the same mistakes as i did... i wonder if they will get too caught up in the "college experience" well i guess i turned out ok... so i think they will be fine... and besides they have something that i didn't have... someone older to knock some sense into them... but bottom line is that they gotta learn by making their own mistakes... my dad used to tell me things with the intent of having me not make those same mistakes but some of that isn't true because i have totally done things that he has told me to steer clear of... but i mean i've learned from them and that's most important right... gah almost time for work... gotta make that money... even though i'm not quite sure what i'm saving it for... i guess a rainy day... we'll see...

till then...beObservant...

Every Day...

so i came across this video while browsing through some of Lights music and i saw that she was featured in a band called Ten Second Epic... i instantly fell in love with the song... reminding me that every day brings new things, new chances, new opportunities, and well just another day to enjoy life...the video is cool so i hope you like it too... [lyrics below]



You said, there's no way the days should feel this short
As soon as one ends, the other starts
You said, all day I feel you're playing a part
When all you ever want to do is leave a mark

[chorus]
Every day, another one wasted
Every day, you get up and face it
Every day is a chance for redemption
Every day, every day

You said, time moves fast but you're still staying in park
As every chance takes off, you don't depart
But it's just the defense
For all the moments that name and define what we do
Well how about you?
We're all scared of breaking though

[chorus 2x]

There's gotta be that something more that gets me through the night
I'm out of touch, it's obvious
I'm out of place and over this
There's gotta be that change that takes my path from wrong to right

You said life is way too short
As soon as one ends, another starts

[chorus 3x]

it looks like it's about to rain...

this summer has gone by a faster than i expected... even though i thought it would have gone a lot slower... i've learned a lot this summer... not just from the classes and being at school... but i guess as a person... i mean i've always known a lot about myself because i find myself fascinated with self discovery... what can i say... i'm a thinker... i have a feeling that perhaps this up coming year will blow by me like the metra or amtrack when i used to wait at train stations... whenever i'm on buses or trains and planes i always wonder where people are going... home to their families... maybe surprising their girlfriends or boyfriends... a business trip... or maybe they just bought a one way ticket to start somewhere new... who knows... i wonder now the next time i'm on a bus or a plane or a train where i'll be going... will it be a one way ticket... an important business meeting... seeing my special someone... i guess you could say i like to travel... and i'm accustomed to traveling... you name it i've done it... if it has wheels or wings i've taken it... i've been to so many places in America... mostly because of my family... having them scattered all over... New York.... California... San Francisco... New Jersey... Sand Diego... Maine... Florida... Texas... Ohio... Missouri... and other places that i know will come up to me later... not really sure where i was going with that... but its been pretty boring in DeKalb but somehow although boring time has passed quite quickly... i guess time is relative... time does not really matter... well it matters but its not as important with interpersonal relations... how long you've known someone... how long you've been dating your girlfriend or boyfriend... because you can talk to someone for 1 hour and feel like you have known them for years... and see someone every day and not even know what their favorite color is... their likes or dislikes... i feel like i have a good grasp on the people that i know... i always try to make it a point to get to know people for longer than i actually know them... it makes for the basis of good friendships... relationships... and i guess people now moving so fast paced don't really do that anymore... who knows... classes are about to end... got about 2 weeks left... then i think the weeks of no school before school will drag the longest... hopefully i'll be able to keep myself buried in work... and working on my car... and working out... maybe if i pile it on i won't have time to worry about other things...

new stuffs on my blog!

ok yeah its not that exciting lol i just added a random comments section for anyone to post up anything about anything... it may be about me, a recent post, if you're hungry, pretty much anything :) oh and if you scroll down a bit more you can feed my fish! because they are constantly wondering if there's food! so make sure to give them some :) oh! also under each post there is a share button if you are so inclined to share it with other people lol anyway yes i am bored and yes i know that you could have found out those things on your own but hey its 3 am and i'm not sleepy in an empty house with nothing to do soooo give me a break! =p

till then...beRandom...

empty house...

all i hear is the constant flow of water from the fish tank... the slight hum from my laptop cooling fan... and other than that.... nothing... i think now is the time where i need to be patient more than ever... things have been thrown into perspective for me... i can sort of see what needs to be done... at what pace i need to be moving at... and can only hope that whatever happens down the road will ultimately make me happy... how i hate being in school right now... i feel as if i'm in a vice... and school just won't let go of me... i'm screaming at it to let me live my life... i'm desperately trying to pick the lock out of the cell that i'm in... but just like in prison... you can be put on paroll or let out early with good behavior... and thats what i need to do... so far i've been doing well... getting good grades... keeping up with my studies... i can't wait for it to be over... soon enough... there will be no more tests... no more quizzes... no more reading assignments... only reading for fun... everything will be for making my life better... i want to be that guy who drives home to his special someone... pick up flowers for the vase on the dinner table every monday so that we could come home to the sight and smell of fresh flowers every day... cook dinner for two every night instead of cooking for one... watch our favorite sitcoms and then just pass out on the couch... but first things first... i can't do or start any of that if i'm still in school... so for now i just gotta play by the rules... hopefully my last year goes by faster than i can imagine...

till then...beFulfilled...

the one that sticks out...

i'm sure we have felt that feeling... where we look out into the world... we have friends... family... and out other significant others... but you have one person that for all of the reasons in the world glows whenever your eyes pass across them... its like standing against the wall at your high school dance... and you catch a glimpse of your high school crush walking towards you you get nervous... and suddenly tremendously shy... until you realize she's just walking over to her boyfriend that's standing next to you... its like that but without the puppy love... its seeing that person that you know will glow forever in your heart... its not a crush... its way more than that... i see the glowing all the time... even if its out of the corner of my eye... its always there... and i believe it will always be there... i don't think anyone else could shine as bright... call me cliche if you want... its the truth... i wonder if i glow... so bright that her eyes can't be taken off mine... that the light of me is always there even in the corners of her eyes... well i guess perhaps i will know someday... i would not want either of us to be "the one that got away" to eachother...

yes i agree it's like a present...

in response to A Sunny Storm's : It's like a present entry... just reading your post made me smile... it made me think about the time when i first felt that way... it was like getting an unexpected gift... i feel like every moment that we keep gets placed into a box and put on the shelves of our heart... but i find myself constantly looking back and picking out old boxes... blowing off the dust that has settled on some of them... yes they still make me happy and grateful for what i remember to be inside them... but there just isn't anything like adding to your collection... i always loved having things to place into new boxes... yeah its nice looking at old presents but they def are not the real thing... and yes not all the things in my boxes give me warm fuzzy feelings but learned from them i have... sometimes i think some of the boxes that seem to be worn out at the corners from being handled too much should be locked... for when i really need it...

just one of those days...

sure you have one of those days... but what if one of those days comes more frequent... there's one thing that i've noticed but i find it easier to blog when there are things on my mind... when there are things that bother me... these days it seems like there is always something on my mind... and that there is always something bothering me... my summer has come and gone so fast i did not even realize that its almost august... nothing special happened to me today... today's like any other day... i set my alarm at 8am even tho i get up uat 10 well because so that i could greet a friend good morning but now i just hit the snooze until 9:45 i don't think it would make any difference if my morning cheer was there or not... but then i'm a teacher assistant from 11-12:15 then i have my computer programming class from 12:30-1:45 but after that i get hungry so i make food and drink a protein shake getting ready for my 3:30 or 4 o'clock workout i try to stay at the gym for about 2 hours... i mean well cuz its good for me and plus it just kills more time in the day... lately i've been having that feeling of just getting through the day... not really enjoying the day... then i'll go home eat a after workout snack... hop in the shower... then watch episodes from my favorite sitcoms... then purposely lose track of time then call it a night when i pass out... sometimes its at 12 sometimes its at 2... then i do it all over again the next day... on the weekends i work... to make money... to save... for nothing in particular... just to save... then the week starts and i get a think to myself maybe this will be the week that's unlike any of the other weeks... but usually by Monday night i get to grips with myself... and just focus on what i'm going to do the next day... but hey what can i say... its just one of those days right?

till then...beSpontaneous...

I Love You...

you'll notice that this video was shot all in Chicago which is my hometown city and well it strikes a chord in my life as well as my heart... by watching this video i notice many places that i've been and had similar experiences with the people in the video so i guess i can relate... but then again i guess we all can relate... Tom (lead singer of plain white t's) and Angie met in Chicago :) it says that at the end but thought i'd share it now...



if only it were easy as 1,2,3,4...

you belong with me...

i love this song and i love this guys covers so check it out! it makes me happy :)



i hope you enjoyed it as much as i did :)

till then...you-belong-with-me...

what are we waiting for?

its interesting how people find each other... may it be in the grocery store and they find out that they like the same cereal... or perhaps a good conversation about life and music and other things of that sort... i feel for the people who are trying to find love out there... when all they want is someone who will text them just to say hey... or i miss you... someone that goes above and beyond for them... someone who cares for them so much because they can feel how much the other compliments them... trust me i feel for you... sometimes i wish that in the morning when i wake up i'd have a text waiting from someone who i really care about... or a missed call after getting out of the rec... my phone has been dead lately and i mean yeah i can text or call other people but its not the same... it also sucks how that when you're in a relationship everyone likes you and is interested in you but then the moment you get out of one its as if they don't even know you... they don't even have to know that you're not in a relationship... i think its some kind of ora that people who are single give off... but i mean i've had my fair share of late night convos that last till the morning... texts that tell me about your day and your accomplishments... and even the "what you up to?" texts... i don't think there should ever be a reason when you want to contact someone... you should just do it... and not worry so much on what the other person might think... maybe because my body is sore from working out or i'm just emotionally drained... but we all have our limits... sometimes we need to take some time to recharge... the length of that recharge i guess depends on how drained you are... i'm pretty drained... tired of fighting... tired of worrying... tired of being there... so i'm just going to be... just be myself... do my own thing... the things that make me happy... i guess if love is meant to find me again it will... maybe with someone new who knows... i guess i can't decide that... and well if my love is out there whoever you may be happens to read this or maybe not even know about me just yet... i would just like to say one thing to her... i'm right here, i'm real, and i will give you my all, so what are you waiting for... but i guess we can only hope right?

till then...beWishful...

Dangerous...

you may say... our lives have changed... but baby i promise that we're still the same... and the leaves are falling quicker... like a rain drop in the spring... i think its your love that i cannot believe... give me attention... give me some time... you see your love is just so dangerous it should be a crime... to notice when you're leaving me without any sounds...oh, i know this might sound selfish... but i love you by yourself... when it comes to your affection... you'd rather be with someone else... and my tears are falling quicker... like a snowflake in the winter... i just wish i had the better side of your heart...

love is...

not sure if these things are still in the news paper but just thought i would share some of the ones i came across...
the reason why i decided to share this with you... besides the fact that they are cute... is that these newspaper cut outs (or were once cut outs)... have a very special place in my family... its because when my mom and dad were dating he would find these in the newspaper... everyday... there would be a new "love is..." cartoon... it was just one box big like the size you see above... my dad would cut it out... and give it to my mom... every day for i'm not even sure how long... perhaps till they stopped putting them in the paper... one day i saw my dad pull this stack of brown papers that were all about the size above but turning yellow from the acids in the air (yes i'm a framer so i know lol)... but it was a stack about an inch and a half thick... i was little when he showed it to me... maybe 12 or give or take 3 years and all he said was "go ask mommy what they are" and thats when she told me that my dad would give those to her every day... even when they were apart... continents apart... she would still get a little letter in the mail with a bunch of those for the days that my dad missed giving the "love is..." cartoons to my mom... i wish they were still in the newspaper... although the message is simple... its moving... sometimes its just what we need...i think this one would be the first one that i would cut out... its amazing how these small comics with so few words... and very simple pictures... paint a much bigger picture... a book with infinite volumes and editions...
till then...beThoughtful...

happy birthday man...

today Tommy Choi turns 23... i wish you were here so that i could take a birthday shot with you... i wish you were here so that we could laugh together again... i miss your hugs... man you're gettin old 23 huh... i'm just kidding haha i'm gonna be there REAL soon... i wonder what you would have been doing at 23... maybe working a full time job... but i know you would always make time to come to NIU and party it up with the rest of your friends... and man would the parties be awesome... not a day goes by that i don't think about you... i still wish you were here... i have questions to ask you... things that i think you could help me with... i mean all i can do right now is just imagine what you would say... but its not the same... and it will never be the same... but its ok... alot of us here have gotten better... but in no way have we forgotten you... i can promise that... i know alot of us here have learned from you... you've changed all of our lives... most if not all for the better... i know because of you i look at life totally different... just don't forget about us haha i know it sounds silly but i mean you might forget since you're in the most wonderful place now... we're gonna still need you to watch over us... well especially me when i go on those long drives... say hi to cyndi and karen for me... i love all of you guys and in time we'll able to take all of the birthday shots that i missed with you... that will be the party to top all parties ever... well don't party too hard up there haha... we all miss you and love you... take care of yourself man...

gives me butterflies...

its nice when people do things that you don't expect... when you are taken aback... when you look at the situation and think to yourself... hey... wow... did that just happen?... its nice its comforting... its unlike anything else... no matter how little the act... or how it may not even mean anything to the other person... i notice... and its nice... warming... things like this... unexpected things... moments when i go woah... nice... give me butterflies... now i admit its not raging butterflies but there butterflies in there for sure ^_^... i can't get ahead of myself but its good now... i feel like maybe... just maybe... perhaps we are moving in one direction... and maybe just maybe we are moving in the same direction... i guess only time will tell... i've been saying that alot lately but its true...

till then...beContent...

just shined the armor should i put it on...

i used to be bold... i think i need to find that boldness and bring it back to the surface... i guess lately i haven't been myself... well i've been myself... just not my true self... i've been over thinking... i should think less and do more... like how i did before... not to over complicate things... things are good right now... i'm patient... and things will always workout in its own way... i have a good feeling about this... this time will be different... this time will be new... this time will be more exciting than the last... i can just feel it... i feel like i'm so close even tho i can't see the end i don't care... because then when i reach the end it will surprise me and hit me like a brick wall... just like how it all began... i can honesly say that i've changed... my priorities have changed.... i've grown... and learned... and know where i want to be... who i want to be with... what makes me happy... as well as learned who my true freinds are... i know life can and will always change around me... and i'll be ready... with my newly shined armor... my shield of love in one hand... and my sword of passion in the other i will fight... i will fight the good fight until the bitter end... why?... because knights never give up... and thats exactly what i'll do... never give up...

till then...beValiant....

a good weekend...

the past weekend was fun got to hang out with some close friends and exchange gifts :) i got a bottle of Saracco which is awesome! i'm going to save that bottle for a very very special occasion... the past weekend was an interesting weekend filled with hanging out and chilling... that weekend i realized more things about myself... things such as how you never realize how much you might need another person until their presence isn't there... how much the other person helps you and how much you help them... some people affect us more than we think... its not bad and i don't see it as a crutch in any way... its those people that bring out the best in us... its those people that cause us to make us truly happy... and its us who make other people happy by... well just being ourselves... i've seen how two people so connected can be each others keys to being happy... i don't know why sometimes we miss whats right in front of us... i know that sometimes when i'm looking for something and its so obviously in front of me that i can't see it, my dad will be like "its right under your nose!"... and i think sometimes we need to be reminded of where it is... i don't want to feel like i'm holding back... so i wont... i want to be out there... to be heard... to be recognized... to make someone happy which in turn will make me happy... i havent been "happy" in a while... well not like before... sometimes i sit and think that maybe it will be a long time before i feel that happiness again... or perhaps not even at all... but when i get those thoughts i always pick myself up dust my self off and remind myself that yes i can be that happy again and it won't take forever... maybe some time yes... and i'm willing to wait... i'm willing to wait as long as it takes... because that still isn't forever... the weekend was good did some bold things... things that i'm glad that i did now that i look back on it... but now i feel something that grew a little bit recently... hope... but its just a little more than what was left... my jar of hope has been dry... i've been surviving on the fumes but now i guess i can see some liquid at the bottom... i was afraid i would run out and be stranded... i just hope that the hope i see isnt a mirage... that my mind is just making it up... like a coping mechanism... i want my hope to be genuine... i want it to be real... and i only want it to grow... grow into something beautiful...

till then...beHopeful...

could not have said it better myself...

be sure to check it out... hop over to a sunny storm's blog

HERE

:)