Plans...

We all make plans, I've made plans, plans to do this, plans to do that, but I've herd the saying somewhere not sure where it came from but it goes something like this "we plan, god laughs" i would consider myself a somewhat religious person that i believe in god n such but the short saying rings some truth.

Alot of things that i've planned for have had a turn for the best and the worst but ultimatly we just never know whats going to happen. if there's anything that i've learned for experience, life, friends, and family its to live life with out regrets i know it sounds cliche but its true. if you feel like doing something you should go ahead and do it (within the realms of the the law of course) because if i ever just went with my plan or just went with what would be best i would have missed out on some of the best parts of my life. In the end i would like to look back on my life and say yeah i did everything that i wanted and the path that i have chose was the best possible path for my life. life's about being happy right? so i'm going to do the things that make me happy BUT being happy or getting to be happy isnt always easy things are never easy (i'm sure you're like yeah yeah i've heard all of this before life is hard) but its true i've never realized how hard life could get until now. my mind racing so fast with my thoughts at night causing me to think of everything and anything. thoughts of love, friendship, careers, family, i feel like i know what to do and what i want with life but then again the saying of how we plan and god laughs still lingers in my mind.

i just hope that god dosent have too much fun laughing (but then again his help is always welcome)

till then...bethoughtful...

a brighter day...

ok sorry for the super last emo post...

emoness aside i've done alot of thinking i mean A LOT of thinking... thinking is in my blood how can i not right?

anyway i'm feeling a lot better now, not my best but better now. i understand what needs to happen and understand what i need to do with my life.

i have family counting on me, friends counting on me, and most importantly myself counting on me

i have goals, goals of finishing up school within the year so that my parents will be proud of me and wont have to pay multiple tuitions since my sisters are entering college

so no more parties (well i mean significantly less) no more wasting time and just "getting by" instead of getting by i need to get through it.

i've been having feelings of constriction, i'm tired of school i need to be done with it already. i want to get out of DeKalb i want to get out of my home town just to somewhere where i can start fresh somewhere new i mean i love my home towns and my family but i feel like i'm not free. life is about being free aint it?

i figure that i should take this time to put some goals down so that i can look back to see if i have accomplished them.

1. be at optimum physical health (since i have a mild case of high blood pressure)
- 1 mile a day
2. graduate school by spring of 2010
3. get a decent career and help my parents pay for my sisters college (of course if i can afford it)
- i mean i won't sacrifice living in a box lol
4. to not forget to have fun in life
- taking time to "stop and smell the roses"

i just need to take things one day at a time...

till then...beStrong...

why...

why do i feel sad... why do i feel like i've lost... why do i feel lost... why do i feel like i'm being replaced... why am i jealous... why am i regretting my thoughts... why does it hurt... why do i feel this way... why am i so paranoid that people are talking behind my back... why do i drink...

i just want it to go away... have it all go away... have it the way it was before... when things were not complicated...

i don't even know whats going on anymore... why do i feel alone... why do i feel angry...

i hope nobody ever experiences what i have even though the sad thing is that people feel this way all the time... how do you cope..

why do you cope...

its a losing battle...

till then... beHappy (or at least try to be......)

random thoughts...

ok yeah i know i haven't posted on here ever but give me a break k?

i'm getting alot older now and i'm not sure what to do about myself, i mean i know the whole finish college thing and get a good job after than and what not and i guess that's what i'm planning to do is to get school done with and over just so that i don't have to worry about it anymore. but what if i don't want it to be over? what if i'm not ready to grow up? what if things are moving way to fast? i have no idea things just sometimes don't make sense like what i should be doing right now. the past year i have been pretty antisocial and for reasons unknown i have started to become more social because making and maintaining friendships require an effort on my part as well. call me crazy but i kind of like how i have one more year (well according to my plan) in school and that would put me up to the 5 year plan which i don't mind because i was talking to my cousin about the 5 year plan and he said its a good way to go because you leave college with no regrets you do the things that you want to do and hopefully... hopefully you don't have any regrets after. so that's why for next year i decided to run for an e-board position on AAA (asian american association) of niu hopefully i'll get a position there elections are in about a month so we'll just have to see.

i guess i like to keep myself preoccupied with things in and around school because thinking about what happens after college stresses me out. internships, careers, where i would want to work somewhere in Chicago or somewhere in Kansas City with my girlfriend Katie who i have been dating for 2 years thank you very much :) but just more questions of keeping in touch with old friends or even getting in touch with friends that i have lost contact with. i'm a people person and i don't want to end up doing the same thing every day, is that too much to ask? or is it just bound to happen... i don't know i guess as of right now i just need to focus on what i'm going to do the next day and well as i always say/tell myself to cross that bridge when you get there.

till then.... beHopeful

First day of school.... again...

Well its going to be my first day back at NIU in a long time.... hopefully things are better this time.... why do i feel like i already want a vacation....

New Toys!!!

The Logitech "Premium Headset"

So excited to start using my new headset! If you know me at all you probably already know that I'm a sucker for gadgets and anything electronic. After a decently long video chat on MSN with my girlfriend in Taiwan, i was tired of holding this small microphone that wasn't even mine (thanks harry) and a half broken headphones that i've had for who knows how long i decided that it was time for a new investment! I figure it will be easier for me and oh did i mention the COOL factor! ...btw this headset is the same one that the bad guy uses in the new hit action flick "Live Free or Die Hard" just wanted to add to the cool factor =]

For all you geeks like me that wanna know the specs well here ya go!

The Logitech Premium Notebook Headset PN980445-0403

Equipped with

Noise Cancelling
Rotating Mic : for optimum voice clarity
Folds Flat : takes up less space
Travel Case!!!
Adjustable Behind-the-Head Design
Soft-Touch Rubber : for my sensitive ears =]
Analog-to-USB Adaptor!

Tec-Specs

Frequency Response:
Headset 20-20,000 Hz, Microphone 100-10,000 Hz
Sensitivity:
-62 dBV/µBar, -42 dBV/Pa+/-3dB
Cable Length:
1.8 M

Yeah you're probably looking at that price and if i was ballin' i'd throw down that much for a headset like this, but really.... do you think i would pay that much?.... do you? ;)

till then... beHappy

Me Like Photobucket!!

Just wanted to post up a video here of what i have been up to these past few weeks/months and well its been very exciting i hope you guys like it! (note: if you know anything about me and Mandy Moore.... i think you'll understand)



till then... becreative...

Back In A FLASH!

cute huh? we're roller blading!!!

well i think its cute THANKS BABY!!!

till then... beInspired

I Know I've Said This Before...

I'll be posting on here in a bit!

There has been many new happenings to me so start checking regularly!

till then... bePatient

United Colors Of NIU!!!!

wow haven't posted in years!!!
if you can come to UCON, but get there early if you want to see me sing.

... don't worry I will be posting more soon...

till then...
beInvolved...

hmm will i be posting again?....... perhaps...... perhaps not...... you'll just have to wait and see.....

YOU KNOW WHAT PISSES ME OFF?

take a good look at this car....

now take a better look at this car....

ok now look at this car....

NOTICE THE HEADLIGHTS!!!!
i DO NOT want to be seen as the car that looks like the Ford Fusion or the Mercury Milan THEY look like the Honda Prelude why am i so angry? its because i am a prelude owner and this just gets me so angry!!!! i'm not shitting on american cars dont get me wrong but damn i have nothing more to say than.... its about time domestic cars have found out what a GOOD LOOKING car looks like.... and where did they start looking??? japanese engineering.... sad...




till then.... beOriginal....

WORK ON YOUR PAPER!!!

This here is KRUNAL he has a paper due the next morning around 11am, and what did we find him doing? not doing his paper obviously... well so we decided to wake him up check it out!!!




till then...beStudious...

STRESSED!!!

This past week has been stressful..... i'm so stressed i can't even write.....



till then...beNOTseressed...